6 Year-Old Tears

Kate came home from School today in tears.

She threw open the door, walked into the house and chucked her backpack across the room.

The first words out of her mouth were,

"It's all your fault!"

I couldn't get any more information out of her for about 5 minutes. Kate gets really quiet when she is angry. She boils for what seems like hours until the tears seem to pop out of her face.

The tears break my heart.

And then I get frustrated and mad.

"Kate, I can't help you if you don't tell me what is wrong."

I finally decide to give her space and I leave the room.
5 minutes later I check on her.
I can't find her.
I look everywhere.
When I go to her room I find her under her covers crying.

Words don't really work with Kate. You have to give her space and time. She is stubborn but also sensitive. She has a hard time communicating her emotions.

I slip into her bed behind her and wrap my arms around her. It is all I can do to just keep my mouth shut. A few minutes pass and she turns into my hug. The tears are still coming.

"Kate, what happened?"

"They all made fun of me." She continued to tell me that some of the kids teased her about her leg-warmers. The kids were suppose to dress silly today, for Dr. Seuss. When I dropped her off at school there were plenty of other boys and girls dressed in mix-matching, funny clothes too. I didn't think that we had gone too extreme and I sort of thought that she was adorable.

I probably messed up the next part by telling her that the other kids were probably jealous of her, or hadn't seen leg-warmers before. I told her that the boys that teased her probably thought that she was cute, and the girls probably thought that she was pretty. I told her that there are lots of ways that kids tease other kids and the reason is never what you would think.

I then told her that there will  be people that come into her life that won't like her.

They won't like who she is, what she looks like, what she does, or what she stands for.

I told her that there will be nothing that she can do to change the way that these people may view her and that she shouldn't waste her sweet tears caring what they think about her. I told her to figure out who she wants to be and to be it.

And then I gave her an extra tight hug, looked into her eyes and told her that her family will always love her. I told her that we will always love who she is, what she looks like, what she does and what she stands for. We will be right here. I told her that her Heavenly Father also loves her more than she could possibly imagine. I told her that she is safe here at home, and that she can tell me anything that troubles her and I will try my best to help her. I told her that her true friends will always have her back, they will always love her and they will always be kind.

Kate, the world won't always love you. 

But I will. 

It's Great To Be 8

Next week is a big week for our family. Dylan is going to be baptized and I am getting so excited. I really want to make it special for him.  He is such a great kid and has such a strong desire to do what is right and to follow Heavenly Father's Commandments.

I can't tell you how many times in the past week he has told me that he is praying for me to feel better. He is really good about praying. I don't think that he and I have missed one morning this year that we haven't prayed together. Well except the one's that I was still in bed and Scott got the kids out the door. I fail as a mother quite a bit, but those morning prayer's go a long way.

Dylan, I sure love You!!!

I made these images to frame side by side for his bedroom.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Goodbye Pajamas, We Are Back

Guess what? We are all feeling better. And feeling better is an amazing thing. I'm not miserable anymore. I'm not grumpy and achy and sick. I still can't hear but I'm going to shower and get dressed and accomplish something.

The first thing that I did today was write a guest post for {this lady}. If you want to read about my first fight with Scott and how he totally won...and how this sort of set up precedent for our Marriage...make sure to visit A Handful Of Peanuts. The Peanuts have been featuring different Love Story's all month. I've found some pretty great bloggers reading through her posts. Head on over there.

And just to brag about my awesome rocking dad, Here is a photo that my mom sent me of him playing with a Band at a club on Valentine's Day. How cute is he all dolled up holding that big bass guitar.

I love you Dad!!!

Only The Strong Survive

The past week has been a difficult one.
Like...really, really hard.

Shouldn't there be a rule that mom's and kids cannot be sick at the same time.

Me: Double Ear Infection, Double Ear-drum rupture, Pink Eye, Upper Respiratory/sinus infection, Cough.
Wyatt: Double Ear Infection, Pink Eye, Upper Respiratory/sinus infection, Cough.
Sawyer: Pink Eye, Upper Respiratory/sinus infection, Cough.
Dylan: Upper Respiratory/sinus infection, Cough.
Kate: Cough.

Scott: NOTHING. He is the Last Man Standing. (Lucky Husband with the Immune System of Steel)

Last week was suppose to be rocking.

Wyatt Turned 1.
Valentine's Day.
Dylan Turned 8.
Lance & Terry came to town.

I did my best, but I was SO miserable.

The babies and I are on Anti-biotics but we still feel terrible. The best I felt all week was after I took Mucinex-D last night. My friend Shawri talked me into it and it really did make me feel better. Not even drinking the bottle of NyQuil helped this girl. Bummer.

It is so hard trying to take care of a family when you are sick. BOOOO.  Not to mention I am pretty much deaf right now and can't hear a thing. Not the phone ring, not the baby cry, not the kids fighting. And I missed another week of Church which really stinks. I so needed it yesterday. Scott & Dylan were the only one's that made it.

The good new is that the world goes on and somehow we make it through and forget it all. And I'm thinking a little bit of Spring could do that for me right about now.

And...

I miss the gym. (Crazy)

Forgetting Anniversaries

What is it about Anniversaries?

Why are some anniversaries so easy to forget and some seem to cling to us. Some are special and filled with so much meaning, some bring pain, some remind us of what we have lost or what we have gained; and every year they deliver their dose of remembering. It is just one date on the calendar and yet life seems to culminate to that ONE big day lurking right around the corner.

A year ago today is the day I woke up in a pool of blood. A year ago today my medical problems started.

A year ago today is the day that my perfect, sweet baby Wyatt came into this world.

Happy Birthday Wyatt.

Your journey into this world was not an easy one. We almost lost you. And my body took a beating for it. But never for one second did I ever, ever, ever not feel complete gratitude that you made it here to me. You see, you made every painful tear, every surgery, every infection, every ER trip worth it.

SO WORTH IT!

Having you to hold in my arms gave me the strength to fight through the hurt. You gave me such a gift Wyatt. Having you made everything okay. It made it so easy to forgive the medical mistakes, to fight through the painful nights, to laugh when I wanted to cry, to fight when I wanted to give up, to move forward when it was all said and done.


But Anniversaries are a funny thing.
It seems only fitting that you came into this world fighting for your life, and I've spent the past year fighting to get mine back.
And here we both are, on your birthday, with terrible, terrible colds. Coughing, sneezing, and wiping our noses, with Pink Eye to boot. But we are sharing it together and I love you even more because of it.

It is me and you kid.
You are my miracle.
You are my sweet baby boy.

I love you to the moon and back, over and over, again and again, you shine in so many ways and my heart has been stretched to capacity because of you.

Happy Birthday Wyatt.

Love, Mama
xoxo

My Definition of "True" Love

"True" Love...as in,

WOW, this isn't at all what I thought it would be.

It is HARD.

It can HURT.

And it takes A LOT of WORK.

I remember sitting down with my Bishop a week or two before our wedding date. Scott and I were young (well he was), and in love, and pretty clueless about what we were getting ourselves into. The Bishop told us that he and his wife had never {did I mention that he said NEVER} exchanged a cross word in their 30 years of marriage. I sat there with my hopeful head spinning, floating off to this place called {dream land} that my Bishop should have told me DIDN'T REALLY EXIST!!! I thought to myself,

"Oh, how romantic, and lovely. That is what our marriage is going to be. We can do it. We love each other SO much. I mean...it is TRUE LOVE after all!"

Well for those of you that are married...

it should come as  NO SURPRISE

that about 4 weeks into our marriage

I completely tossed my idea of what a PERFECT MARRIAGE should be.

Perfect just can't exist when there are TWO IMPERFECT people involved.

So for me "TRUE" love is about trying for more of this:

TRUST
COMMITMENT
HUMILITY
SELFLESSNESS
KINDNESS
HAPPINESS
LOYALTY
HUMOR
LOVE
SERVICE
INTIMACY

And less of this:

Selfishness
Greed
Insincerity
Darkness
Dishonesty
Heartache
Tears
Stubbornness
Pride
Complacency
Meanness

 And so you see,

Our Marriage isn't Perfect

But our LOVE STORY is.

We laugh.

We forgive.

We try.

We keep trying.

We kiss.

We give.

We serve.

We continue on.

Day after day after day.

Because the TRUTH about love is that the more you give, the more you get.

And the TRUTH is...
9 years ago, when I met Scott at church, and he introduced himself to me as 'Steve' because he was flirting, and I followed him out into the hall and gave him a little pinch on his bottom and a wink because I was flirting, our "TRUE LOVE" ignited. And that FLAME is still BURNING.

And here is a little note I wrote to Scott, a few years back.

Love Letters by Erin Peterson


I don't tell you often enough of the huge space you occupy in my heart.

I miss writing you love letters.
I think I shall start.

I love you.

It's a different kind of love.

It started as one big giant explosion...

and simmered to one, constant glowing flame.

It is steady, warm and pure.

Our flame is ours.
It works for us.

My love for you will  never dim.
It can't.

You ignite my heart.
You quicken my breath.
You heat my soul.
You're my perfect match.

And we will continue blazing through life together.

You and me...on fire.

~~~~~~

Happy Valentine's Day Scott.
The whole family is sick.
This day isn't going to be very romantic.
But when I asked you to please empty the dishwasher this morning because I couldn't bring myself to do it, and I came back into the room and you were scrubbing the sink with everything in it's place.
That was SEXY.

I love you STUPID. (Is this a harsh pet name because I kind of like it?) Even though you forgot your socks on our wedding day and had to wear black ones. (As the photo's above will illustrate.) And I'm so glad that you love me. (Even though I snored SO SO SO loud last night {his words} because I am super sick.)

I am loving the journey, and I'm loving you always,

Snoobs.

Death By Cupcakes...

When your new neighbor that likes to make cupcakes becomes your friend Becky that likes to make cupcakes...

You end up with TONS of cupcakes.

I couldn't believe my eyes when 

I received a delivery of 26 cupcakes.

26 people!

I immediately had to sample the three different flavors and then I had to call 911 for emergency transport of remaining cupcakes.

Lucky for me I have several neighbors that were more than willing to take them off my hands.

Spreading Joy through cupcakes is the best feeling in the world.

Coconut Kiss

Vanilla Cake

Coconut Cream Filling

Almond Coconut Butter-cream

Love Me Lemon

Lemon Cake

Lemon Curd Filling

Lemon Butter-cream

Razzmanian Devil

Devils Food Cake

Raspberry Reduction Filling

Raspberry Butter-cream

Love Me Lemon was my favorite-

Such Amazing Deliciousness

And then this nameless friend showed up on 
my doorstep a week later.

Mint

Ganache

Need I say more????

Laughed So Hard I Cried!

My dear cousin Ellery shared this image via Instagram and I almost died of a laugh-attack. Seriously it was so funny.

Her caption read...

 "Dear Gwen, love your new Target line, but do not tell me you don't know what is wrong with these shirts..."

Anybody out there see what we see?

(I don't want to ruin it for you so click on comments to read the funny responses that she got...)

Computer Overload!

I don't know what is going on but I am in a Social Media and Blogging FUNK.

Kind of burnt out a bit. All of a sudden I feel no desire to sit down and look at my screen and since this NEVER happens, I am just going to roll with it. (It could NOT have anything to do with a messy desk, I'm sure of it.)

I've been going to the gym, watching what I eat, playing with the kids, reading good books, totally caught up on laundry, vacuuming everyday, drinking tons of water, reading to the kids, cooking dinner and watching a few movies.

Anyway, I hope all my friends are doing great out there!!!

Fill me in on what's the latest.

Any favorite blog posts this week that I need to check out.

Leave me a comment with the link!

Love to you ALL!!!

New York City Through My Lens

I haven't posted any pictures from my New York Trip for a while

so I thought I would share a little

GLIMPSE..

I didn't spend one second shopping, dining out, or seeing a Broadway show.
I wanted my first trip to New York to be full of sounds, smells, color & people.

I only had about 48 hours to take it all in.

It was Magical.

An End In Sight...

There is a light at the end of the tunnel!!! I am almost finished with my 2011 book-work and taxes. I'm trying to ignore everything else until I am done.

Well, not the kids of course.

But EVERYTHING ELSE.

It will feel so good to be finished!

It won't however feel so good to be writing a 5 digit check to the IRS in April. Ouch.

Side Note:

***So happy about Romney taking Florida!!!